Friday, March 4, 2011

Postcard from Mercury

Hi Bren,

I know I ain't seen you in a while cause I been on Mercury.  It's closest to the sun 'n the sun's like ninety millyun miles from earth so I can't come home for the weekend or nothin' right now.  But it's cool cause there ain't no school here.  Plus it's hot in the daytime.  Too bad it's so stinkin' cold at night, I hafta stay inside, but I can go out in the mornin' 'fore it gets too hot.  There's lotsa rock here 'n Mercury's got more craters 'n a kid with bad acne.  So I hafta carry a baseball bat so's I c'n swat alla rocks come flyin' at me outta nowhere.  Plus it's real windy cause the solar wind's always dumpin' space junk here.  It's cool though cause there ain't too much gravity here so when I kick my soccer ball I can kick it so high it takes ten minutes to come back down.  Me 'n my friend play soccer 'n I win cause he only got a snakey legs 'n then a tail so's he can balance.  His name's Nyrk 'n he's got four eyes 'n lil bitty hands.  He's real tall 'n I grew tall too cause even though the planet's all metal there no gravity made us stretchy.  And wobbly too.  I live in my house I built in a crater cep it's near the wall so if another crater hits, maybe I ain't get blown up.  You gotta come! 


Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Snow White and Rose Red

Well them two sisters was real close 'n they always took care'a each other 'n stuff like me 'n my sis, but they ain't was the same.  Snow White was sorta like Bren cause she liked bein' home 'n sittin' with her mom 'n makin' nice things, 'n Rose Red was always runnin' round outside 'n prolly gettin' in scrapes 'n stuff like me.  Cep I ain't pick no flowers or catch butterflys or nothin' cause I'd ruther be playin' soccer.  But they prolly ain't have soccer back then, else Rose Red'ud prolly be doin' that too.  Anyway, even though they ain't the same, they was real close 'n they knew they'd always be best friends 'n be together 'n they shared their stuff like we do mostly.  Cep sometimes we ain't always share, but mostly we do.  But they was together lots 'n best friends 'n they even went off 'n got married together 'n they married some brothers so they ain't never hafta live too far apart, so that was cool.  I'd say I hope me 'n my sis do that cep I ain't gettin' married cause boys mostly got cooties.

This story's pretty cool though even if them sisters is kinda goody two-shoes 'n they ain't play no soccer or ride dirt bikes or nothin'.  It's way better than the real Snow White 'n I ain't sure these stories is the same at all.  Cause the other Snow White, her step mom like...hated her 'n tried'a get this guy to kill her cep he couldn't do it so he got her lost in the woods 'n she lived with the dwarves 'steada rescuin' em alla time 'n they was way nicer'n the one in this story.  He was a hoptoad 'n he put the prince under a spell so Snow White hadda rescue him.  I like that way better cep it'ud be cooler if she hadda fight a dragon or climb a tower or somethin' insteada just catchin' the dwarf with his treasure so the bear could kill 'im.  You ain't oughta be mean to folks that was good to you when you ain't had no one else.  If the dwarf ain't been so rotten, maybe he ain't'ud got croaked like that.  But it's better anyhow 'cause then the prince ain't hadda be a bear no more, even though maybe it was really cooler to be a bear.